Musings

I thought we were a middle class family as I grew up. We always had food available and a dry place to sleep. It was often a cold place to sleep, but we had blankets. Our clothing sometimes had holes in it, but it was clean clothing. When I put on a sock that had a hole in the heel, I would pull the toe until the hole was under my heel, turn the toe under my foot, and then put my shoe on. We had all of life’s necessities, but there wasn’t a lot of money available for things we merely wanted. However, we did always have enough money to buy dog food. That says something about Daddy’s priorities. I don’t think they were bad priorities. Not having everything I wanted made me resolve to work hard so I could have them later in life when I was setting my own priorities.

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Promises I made to myself:

Orange Juice

I have really liked orange juice all of my life. Orange juice was not on Mommy’s standard shopping list. The only time we had orange juice was when somebody got sick. Daddy would buy a 46 ounce tin can of orange juice. I think the acid in the juice dissolved some of the tin can and changed its taste. Only the lucky person who was sick got to drink almost all of the juice. Those of us who were unlucky enough to be well got only a few small sips. I promised myself that I would work hard and get a job that paid enough for me to keep orange juice in my refrigerator all of the time. I would drink juice whenever I wanted to. I fulfilled that promise to myself. I drink orange juice or the equivalent (grape, grapefruit, pineapple) every morning for breakfast. That first taste of juice in the morning still reminds me to be thankful that I am rich enough to have juice every day.

Hoeing in the Garden

Another promise I made to myself was that I would not hoe in a garden. I never did like hoeing the garden. My back would start hurting right off the bat. I would be miserable until I was able to stop hoeing. The worst times were after a mid-afternoon thundershower. It would sometimes rain only enough to dampen the top half-inch of the dirt in the garden. When the hot sun reappeared, Mommy would tell us to go back to work. It was useless and sometimes even perilous to complain or protest. The muddy dirt would stick to the hoe and to my fingers. After the mud had made each of my fingers about an inch in diameter, the gnats would come onto the scene. It is hard to scare gnats away from your face and ears using only your elbows. I wouldn’t use my hands because they were muddy.

Oatmeal

When Mommy found a breakfast food that was inexpensive and easy to cook, she would feed it to us until we were tired of it and all but refused to eat it. That is what happened with oatmeal. The first five hundred gallons I ate was pretty good. The next five hundred gallons were still okay. I did not care much for the next one thousand gallons. I promised myself that I would not eat oatmeal until I wanted it. At this point in life, it is unlikely that I will ever eat another bowl of oatmeal.

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I hear a lot of people complain about their job. They have to work too hard. Their boss is unreasonable. Their boss is stupid. The pay is too low. I think it was helpful for me to stop every once in a while and remember how I felt when I learned that I had been hired. That first day on the job was interesting and nice. I was glad to begin receiving a regular payday.

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When I invited Daddy to my wedding, he asked me if I was sure I wanted to get married. I told him I was. He then said I should not get married until I just absolutely could not stand not being married. I was married later that day, but that’s another story.

Whenever two people are in a serious relationship, they tend to repress some of their thoughts and actions that they think might offend the other partner. Both of them keep this up until the wedding vows have been exchanged. Now, they are joined together and the other one can’t escape. Each one relaxes and stops holding back the behaviors that may have strained the relationship before the wedding. Each one begins instructing the other one what he/she needs to do to become the perfect spouse. Both are offended and each one thinks he/she is already the perfect spouse. It takes a lot of give and take to reach an acceptable middle ground. Some marriages die before that middle ground is reached.

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People tend to become what they think other people think they are.